badass bible verses

April 7, 2008 at 12:57 am (randoms)

http://www.cracked.com/article_15699_p2.html

lol cracked.com is really funny.

my favourite bit of the article:

Or, perhaps “donkey’s jawbone” was mistranslated from the original Hebrew word for “minigun.”

Runners up for this spot on the list included Josheb-Basshebeth, who according to 2 Samuel 23:8, “… raised his spear against eight hundred men, whom he killed in one encounter.” Obviously he lost points for killing fewer men and for using an actual weapon to do it, which almost seems like cheating at this point.

There was also Anath in Judges 3:31, who “struck down six hundred philistines with an oxgoad.” An oxgoad is a sharp stick you used to poke oxen. That started the Israeli tradition of killing large numbers of their enemies with farmyard tools, which continued through Samson and onto modern times, where the Six Day War of 1967 was won by a crippled Israeli peasant wielding a watering can.

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